Essay Example on Narcissism

Oftentimes in our everyday life we’ll encounter people who seem to love themselves just a bit too much. Everyone thinks about themselves. Humans by nature are selfish, however there’s a difference between being selfish or maybe a bit self-centered as opposed to being self obsessed and narcissistic. The first is normal, whereas the latter is genuinely a problem and even a personality disorder. I’m sure that you can think of at least one person in your life who may be a narcissist. However, when people address someone as such they don’t actually have a personality disorder, a problem yes, but genuinely is something wrong with them? In order to fully understand if someone is a narcissist and not just self centered you have to first understand what narcissism is, what causes it, and how to properly identify it.

The word narcissism comes from Ancient Greece, specifically a myth about Narcissus. Narcissus, son of the river god Cephissus and nymph Liriope, was supposedly one of the most attractive mortals in Greece. He was told he was good looking throughout his life, but he was never permitted to look at his reflection as it had previously been prophesied by a blind seer that if ever did catch sight of himself he would die. Somehow he never once saw himself throughout his childhood, but that did not stop him from feeling self confident. However as he grew older the constant compliments went to his head and caused him to develop an inflated ego. He turned down countless declarations of love from mortals, nymphs, and even minor gods. Eventually the gods started to take notice of Narcissus, after all it isn’t everyday that one mortal leaves hundreds of people heartbroken. Finding his dismissive and haughty nature to be irritating they decided to do something about it. Echo, a nymph, or in some versions Ameinias, a young man, fell head over heels for Narcissus. They confessed their love to him and just as he had done to countless others before he dismissed the confession. Scoffing at them, he sauntered away. The gods had had enough of him and guided him to a hidden grotto. In the grotto was a small pond, with glass like water that reflected its surroundings perfectly. Narcissus, despite his curse, decided to look into the water. When he did, staring back at him was the most beautiful man he had ever seen. Instantly he fell deeply in love and reached out to touch him. When his hand touched the water however the man disappeared into the ripples of the pond. Narcissus tried and tried to touch the man, sitting on the ground beside the pond, doomed to waste away in love for his own reflection.

Now that you know the origins of the word itself you may already better understand what narcissism actually is. Narcissism by itself is a description, an adjective, it’s used to describe someone who is self absorbed, often putting themselves above others. However this does not immediately mean they have a personality disorder. Narcissistic personality disorder, or NPD, is more commonly found in men and generally first recognizable during the teens and early adulthood. Some symptoms are obvious and easy to see, such as an inflated sense of ego and self worth. Another one that's easy to point out and identify is a constant need for attention and admiration from others. Which if not met can result in anger and outbursts of emotion. People with NPD will belittle and talk down to others, often to make themselves look better, or just simply because they believe these other people are below them. They will oftentimes not talk to or even associate with people they believe are not up to their level. They expect recognition as being superior in things that they may not even know how to properly do, they insist on being the best at everything. This also includes having the best of everything (best apartment, car, degree, etc…) They’ll behave in a way that makes them seem haughty, prideful, and arrogant. People who suffer from this disorder also struggle feeling empathy, they can’t recognize others feelings and needs properly and most of the time have no problem using or manipulating others for personal gain. A person who has this disorder may also have a difficult time admitting or recognizing they have it. 

So you know the symptoms of NPD, but what could cause such an exaggerated personality, and how does it affect those who have it? Just as with most disorders there are several things that can cause this. One of course being just genetics, if your family has a history of people who’ve had NPD then you have a higher chance of developing it as well. Something else that can cause it has to do with neurobiology, the way the brain and nervous system works and affects the rest of the body, depending on how your brain is working it can make it more or less likely that you’ll have narcissistic personality disorder. Finally, the most common cause, environmental factors. Generally the biggest environmental factor is a parent-child imbalance, or poor parenting style. The two most extreme examples of this include a parent(s) who is overprotective, over praising, and highly defensive of their child, insisting they are perfect or in other cases a neglectful even times abusive parent(s) who constantly talks down their child. Neither of these parenting styles are even remotely good for a child, and are thought to be a cause of NPD. Of course this personality disorder, or really any for that matter, wouldn’t be that much of a problem if it weren’t for how it affects the person suffering from it. People with NPD are highly sensitive to criticism, and often emotionally immature. It can cause problems in school, work, home lives, and relationships. It can also lead to addiction or substance misuse, depression, anxiety, and even suicidal thoughts/actions. 

NPD is a serious problem for people who have it, and not something to be taken lightly. Hopefully now that you know the meaning of the word narcissism, where it came from, and the basics of NPD you can differentiate between that and just selfishness. Because there is a difference. People can be self centered, rude, and have narcissistic traits without actually having narcissistic personality disorder. So if someone you know seems a bit stuck up don't immediately jump to the worst conclusion. However if you are genuinely concerned that you or a loved one may have NPD and frequently exhibits symptoms to match it go see a doctor and have them (or yourself) diagnosed. In conclusion there are many layers to narcissism, not all as extreme as others, ranging from just small actions and behaviors to a full blown disorder.