Family and Relationships in the Giver Essay Sample
Imagine living with a family who doesn’t actually love you. Imagine not being able to feel love yourself. In the novel The Giver by Lois Lowry, families don’t feel love for each other. They live their day to day lives by rules that constrict them from feelings of pain, and love. The main character, Jonas, earns the job of Receiver of Memories and learns the truth about the community and emotion. Lowry demonstrates how a community without deep emotion impacts Jonas, how he longs for love, and how he begins to feel a connection with Gabe. The Giver by Lois Lowry, portrays the importance of family relationships and the need for love.
First, Lowry depicts the importance of love by excluding it from family units in The Giver. Spouses and children are simply chosen for each other and everybody takes pills to not feel deep emotion. After Jonas experiences a memory of love transmitted from the Giver, he asks his parents, “Do you love me?" Jonas’s parents respond in a snotty tone, “Jonas. You, of all people. Precision of language, please!’. . . ‘You used a very generalized word, so meaningless that it's become almost obsolete’” (159,160). Jonas is very shocked that his parents could say such a thing about the wonderful feeling of love. His parents couldn’t say that they loved him because they didn’t. Another example from the book is when Jonas says, “‘. . . They’ll go live with the other childless adults.’ And they won’t be part of my life anymore” (156). This is hinting that after the children grow up, they are no longer their parents’ kids and they are no longer part of the family.
Next, Lois Lowry shows how Jonas longs for love and everybody deserves to experience it. Jonas feels love after he receives the memory of grandparents and he says, “‘I liked the feeling of love’” (158). Later, after Jonas’s parents tell him love is meaningless, he talks to Gabe saying, “Things could change Gabe”. . . “There could be love”’ (161,162). The next day, Jonas stops taking his pills. This shows that he no longer wants to follow the community’s rules and he is willing to break them in order to feel love. He wants a family who connects with him and cares about him.
Lastly, Lowry portrays Jonas’s love for Gabe through his actions. When Jonas’s father states, “‘It’s bye bye to you Gabe in the morning’” (207). Jonas knows Gabe will be released and killed in the morning so he decides to leave that night risking everything. If Jonas was caught leaving the community he would have been killed. Another way Lowry shows Jonas’s love for Gabe is after they escape the community and they are fighting to survive. She writes, “He wept because he was afraid now that he could not save Gabriel. He no longer cared about himself” (218). This really shows how much Jonas loves Gabriel when he no longer cares about himself, but only cares about Gabe.
Loving and healthy family relationships are very important in the real world. Love matters because it makes our lives meaningful. When we love people, it makes us want to spend time with them and care about them. According to the National Center for Biotechnology Information, “Family relationships provide resources that can help an individual cope with stress, engage in healthier behaviors, and enhance self-esteem.” If we didn’t have families or friends, we would be living our lives without anybody to support us and help us through tough times. NCBI also says, “The quality of family relationships, including social support (e.g., providing love, advice, and care) and strain (e.g., arguments, being critical, making too many demands), can influence well-being through psychosocial, behavioral, and physiological pathways.” This means that a caring but firm family will encourage you to grow as a person and make you feel comfortable and safe. That is the kind of life everybody should have a chance to live.
Loving family relationships are an important part of life in The Giver and in the real world. Jonas, who stops taking his pills to feel love, is not only told by his parents that love is meaningless, but he also longs for a loving family who cares for him. Part of that family is Gabe who Jonas begins to bond with and who he risks his life to save. Lois Lowry shows that love is an important part of living a truly happy life. Therefore, we should be grateful to live among loving families, friends, and communities. “If you want to bring happiness to the world, go home and love your family.” - Mother Teresa
Works Cited
Thomas, Patricia A, et al. “Family Relationships and Well-Being.” Innovation in Aging, Oxford University Press, Nov. 2017, https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5954612/.
