How to Better Myself and Become a Stronger Person (The Death of Ivan Ilyich and Metamorphosis Analysis Essay)

The opportunity system and family dynamic I was born in to put me at a certain disadvantage in this modern world, however I am infinitely grateful for what I was given and the important lessons I learned while navigating this beautiful life. One thing I have learned; is that everyone has their vices, from loving junk food a little too much or perpetually being awkward in social situations. Upon some personal reflection, I found my vices to be putting my own happiness second to the happiness of others and taking what people say or do way too personal. When comparing my personal vices to the main characters vices in our readings so far, new perspectives surfaced, some that I found to be helpful in facing my own vices. In Metamorphosis by Franz Kafka, Gregor Samsa, taught me the negative side effects of putting people above your own needs, even family. Ivan Ilyich, taught me how to care less about certain things in The Death of Ivan Ilyich by Leo Tolstoy. These two pieces of literature, Metamorphosis and The Death of Ivan Ilyich, have enlightened me on how to better myself and become a stronger person. For Gregor Samsa, he worked day-in,day-out for his family, providing every need for them. Gregor did not mind the grueling work, he found pride in providing for his family after his fathers business failed five years prior. Gregors vice is that he did not pay much attention to the lack of appreciation from his family. The consequences of this where that his family members took advantage of him, and only by logic and a little modernism, did he turn in to a giant bug. Sometime after becoming a giant bug, he discovers the family did indeed have money, and chose to keep that fact from Gregor - though Gregor stated he never explicitly asked them about their money situation, he feels the transaction was no longer “warm” after hearing this. I see myself in Gregor, I too have worked hard and put countless amount of hours in to the people I love, only to have little return or consideration of my efforts. Moreover, Gregor rarely thinks of himself and focuses solely on the well-being of his family, but the family dismissed Gregor, paying him little attention or care. Even after discovering about the hidden money and enduring the neglect, he still would sacrifice his happiness for them. In part III, after Gregor is injured with an apple thrown by his own father, starves himself, and is cooped up in his dirty room for months, he hears his sister play the violin for the lodgers (the three men the family have rented a room to for passive income). He desperately wants to join them in the living room, to enjoy his sisters lovely music. Shown here in part III on page ninety -nine, “ Attracted by her playing, Gregor...was sticking his head into the living-room… It scarcely surprised him that he had become so inconsiderate of the others...his considerations had been a source of pride.”  Once, and only once does he do something for himself, he goes forth anyway and listens to the music. Unsurprisingly, he is discovered and astonishes the families guests, then is pushed back in to his room. Later that day he dies of starvation, his last moments where spent thinking kindly of his family, even after betraying him. Metamorphosis has shown me the consequences of putting your happiness and needs second. Surely I do not wish to turn in to a giant bug, an extreme but powerful example to learn from though. Gregors final action was for himself, out of the consideration of his other family members, and gave him the last bit of happiness to die peacefully. This act is one I will take in to consideration when navigating further in to my life. Gregor’s fictional, bug-life taught me an important lesson I will carry on in to my real, human-life; consider your own happiness first for it could be the last time you do. 

One of the cruelest thing about life is that you never know if you are doing it “right” or not, that is, until your deathbed and everything becomes abundantly clear. Like many modern humans, Ivan Ilyich, a high-court judge in Russia, a character in the novella Death of Ivan Ilyich based in 19th  century, he falls prey to this exact cruelty. Through out the book he avidly avoids anything that is not, “easy, pleasant, merry, and always decent and approved of by society.” He avoids his wife, his kids, and in general anything that is not considered acceptable to his potion in society. Ivan focus his energy solely on his work, obtaining more power, and looking rich or high class; this is his vice, his superficial-materialistic view of life. Later in the One evening while hanging curtains, Ivan fell off his ladder and hit a door knob, causing him some discomfit at first but develops in to horrendous pain, eventually the wound kills him. Before passing, Ivan spiraled and he became more irritable, especially when the physicians tell him that his condition is terminal. At that point, Ivan is now alone with his own mind, unable to fill his time with superficial life, facing his vices and mortality. Ivan is stuck by the sour taste of his superficial life when authentic life is shown to him by Gerasim, his kindness and compassion for Ivan makes it clear to Ivan that he has not lived the “right” life. In the process of dying, Ivan sees a bright light, and he reaches to his son. He pities his son, along with his wife and daughter, hoping that his death would release them from these sufferings. I can relate to Ivan, I often find myself wondering if I am living the right life as well, or maybe I am simply on the wrong path all together. I come from generational poverty; as most poor families do, mine worked tirelessly to supply a better foundation for the future generation. The sacrifices they made,made  it possible for me to grow-up in a real home as a child and go on into college as an adult, continuing the line of sacrifices for our kids. This pressure of breaking out of generational poverty is one similar to the pressure Ivan felt to be accepted by the 19th century society. Ivan’s character has shown me the important things in life, what to care about, and that a simple, compassionate life is sufficient.

Bluntly stated, Ivan Ilyich and Gregor Samsa’s characters had a vice that in some way, led them both to their deaths. Gregor was a blindly-loyal man who was taken advantage of by his family, and Ivan was a superficial, self-interested man who never got to appreciate the good things in life. These characters and their stories supply different lessons to various people, for me their stories where easily applicable to my own life. As perviously stated, I most often consider other peoples needs and happiness before my own and lack knowledge of how to live the right life (what to care about and what not to care about). Both of these characters have taught me a life-long lesson and helped me better define my view of life.