Personal Perspective on Sibling Room Sharing

đź“ŚCategory: Family, Home, Life
đź“ŚWords: 1053
đź“ŚPages: 4
đź“ŚPublished: 20 March 2022

Preface: 

I would like to start this by saying that I am not writing this to be combative or start an argument of any kind between anyone. I am not at all entitled or qualified to influence your decisions for your own household and family, it is absolutely your responsibility and decision for whatever happens. I am writing this because I can see how much this upsets Lily and I am worried about her and am upset that I cannot do anything about it to make it better. I do not know your side of the story, position, or reasons for doing this and I am not judging them. Finally, all this information is from the internet and my own experience which is not the same as yours or anyone else’s. I don’t think this is considered an argumentative essay because I do not know your side, or any benefits of the situation so it is explicitly the effects of room sharing in general and from what I have seen. If you have read this and feel that I am overstepping, feel free to not read the rest and I am sincerely sorry!

I found a lot of articles on the benefits of siblings sharing a room, they take up less space and may keep each other occupied, but all the articles about this are of children that are similar ages or at least both before puberty. In one article it said that often older siblings and younger siblings are roomed together because it can increase empathy in the older sibling. But I find this is mostly only true for siblings that are both still in the same general age range, for example, a 3-year-old and a 7-year-old are growing up at a similar rate, and learning from each other constantly, but a teenager will not have the same understanding with younger children. 

There is already a lot of conflict between siblings, so enclosing and having them share the space means more fighting and no private space to run away or shut yourself in to cool off. It would likely be more disruptive and louder, as they would still be the same, but it would be closer, and they would be moving between living room and bedroom constantly. Sharing a room would give Lily’s brother and sister free reign to mess with her stuff, even if there are rules against it, it will likely still happen. Having more fighting will only increase stress in everyone and younger children will not be as affected by arguments as a teenager, they may have small tantrums about things said or done but usually it doesn’t last long, teenagers keep it together more, leading it to overflow causing breakdowns or long-term stress and anxiety about when it will happen next. Teenagers have much stronger unstable feelings from puberty, I know for me personally there are days where I feel overwhelmingly sad, or angry for no reason and I don’t want to be around people because I know it will end badly.

Privacy is extremely important especially for teenagers, we need a personal space to be alone and private especially after school of work, whether we are by ourselves or with friends or a romantic partner. If her siblings are moved into her room Lily will not have her own personal space. Right now, the siblings spend a lot of time in the living room, all their stuff is there, but moving them to her room will just have them using both her room and the living room at the same time. If you do not have a private space, it is hard to focus, you need a separate space to do work in. 

A teenager must worry about grades a lot more than elementary students, grades are taken a lot more seriously in high school than in elementary or even middle school, teenagers get more important, difficult, and often a larger quantity of work than younger children. All sickness is shared, if siblings get it, she will get it too, which also leads to time out of school. Sleep is one of the most important things because it influences absolutely everything in your life, and its especially valuable when you are still developing. Teenagers have a hard time getting to sleep by ourselves. Even without other people or technology I struggle to get a healthy amount of sleep. Sleep will influence grades and performance at school, less sleep will cause stress, lack of focus and depression for just a few examples. For kids where there is a larger age gap, bedtime can be disrupted. Plus, there are many times when Savoy, Netsanet, Lily and I can only contact through phone and usually only after school, but we may not be able to because of no private place to call, and not enough time to because of conflicting bedtimes, and DND nights are already difficult with us not being able to do it at another house often because of Lily being home for siblings, and others not being free.

  • As kids grow up they might want more privacy and need their own space, especially if they're sharing a bedroom with a brother or sister. While it's not illegal for them to share, it's recommended that children over the age of 10 should have their own bedrooms – even if they're siblings or step-siblings. Children aged 16-19 are counted as needing their own bedroom
  • Siblings Sharing a Bedroom: Guidance | NSPCC

According to child and family therapist Emily Kircher-Morris developmental changes, not age, provide a better indicator that it may be time to look at separating siblings, “There isn’t a specific age cut-off that requires that opposite-sex children separate rooms,” she says. “Parents should monitor where their children are, developmentally, and make decisions from there. But by the time children reach puberty, it will be much more difficult for them to feel comfortable sharing a room, and the need for privacy and space should be respected as much as possible.” At what age should Children/Siblings stop sharing a Bedroom? | Cuckooland

In conclusion, I don’t know. In the end it is your decision to make no matter what. It makes sense to go through with it if you are already starting to, but just keep in mind that it is still invading space and be understanding towards Lily and her brother and sister’s feelings about it because it’s sure to be hard. I am going to pretend I have any knowledge or advice on any of this information, because I don’t, I am not you, I am not a mother and am never planning to be, so please don’t take this as criticism I am just upset I can’t make Lily feel better about it.

+
x
Remember! This is just a sample.

You can order a custom paper by our expert writers

Order now
By clicking “Receive Essay”, you agree to our Terms of service and Privacy statement. We will occasionally send you account related emails.